Well this morning I went in for my beta. After 30 minutes, 6 pokes, and 3 nurses they finally got blood! The third nurse that finally got it asked if I cheated and tested. I said yes. She asked if it was positive I said no. She asked when and I said Thursday morning. She then told me its probably still 3-4 days to early. I had a tiny bit of hope walking out of there, more than I did yesterday. Well I came home, my temporary home that is, and went to the bathroom. There was brown all in my panty liner, and redish pinkish when I wiped. I now have to use pads because its pretty bad. I'm pretty sure that it didn't work. If it comes back positive then I don't know why the hell I'm bleeding. I'm still waiting on the official call though.
This has nothing to do with TTC, but I don't feel like making another blog so I'm just gonna bitch here.
My school just called. I've been putting off getting my crap done because I haven't been feeling well and everything so I just didn't know if I wanted to start or not. Well she said that she wants me to move to the associates, from bacholers, that way my credits transfer and it will be cheaper. Then she said with the associates I need 2 letters of reccomendations. I know I can get one from my cousin since I have watched and will be watching her daughter. But I have no idea who the hell else I am going to get another one from. Then she also said I needed to fill out FAFSA and get my high school transcripts. All of this has to be done by the first week of August. So after all this shit I still need to get done I called my high school and guess what. THEY ARE CLOSED FOR THE SUMMER! How in the world am I gonna be able to get my transcripts when they don't open back up til August 3rd!?! ERRRR. I'm not sure what to do.
I feel like such a damn failure. I can't do anything. I can't get pregnant. I can't even finish school. What a loser I am.
Not sure what my next step in life is, but it doesn't sound like a baby or school.
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